Friday, 30 January 2009


To Whom It May Concern,

A BIG ROYAL hello to the loyal readers! It's the third installment of "THE CONFESSIONS OF A ROYAL BIATCH!" Marc and I are back in full force and we have some things to get off of our chests!

So today, I feel like calling out three groups of people! Yeah, that's right! The BITCH is BACK! And this time there is NO group hug and no hollering around! WWE AND TNA, really? Again? STILL? You are still being bad! I didn't think I had to call you out again! I thought I scared you the last time with my huge FAT rant that brought even my mom to tears, and she doesn't cry EASILY!And let's welcome a new group to the trial of getting on a Royal BAD SIDE! Main Event Mafia!

So let's bring our tale of destruction with those weirdos!So really, Main Event Mafia, who really doesn't know what a mafia is, makes a jab at WWE. -.- Okay really, nice job! They said one of the ugly referees was a WWE Champion. This makes no sense as most of them in Main Event Tranny were Main Event Champions in WWE. You sound dumb! Seriously find your brains! So those weirdys were in control of iMPACT. They made a wubby match with Kongtourage vs ODB. Yes, it was wonderful. But WHERE WAS THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE or "SARAH PALIN"? You people definitely should never try your hand at being vocal or run anything! o.O It was horrendous. I nearly BARF all of my breakfast. And Booker T talking about Raisha Saeed! At least, Raisha Saeed looks like a normal person. He HAS SOOO MANY SPOTS ON HIS FACE. You know he's been doing drugs, it affects your skin! Holler!!But the WWE jab wasn't their fault. No no no!

TNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! You booked that monkey crap. That deformed MONKEY CRAP! You know the voices that Randy Orton hears should council him to punt yous in the nose! You only had Kongtourage and ODB basically on. Lauren and Sharmell don't count as they just wave on and off interviewing weirdos. But really? Way to go with storylines! So interesting! NOT!! I really hope to throw my US Government textbooks at yous!

Let's get off of these mongrels since they will never learn how to truly entertain even if Santa Claus gave them that as a gift!

Now onto WWE. Really? Seriously WWE? No divas on Smackdown. Bad move! You should just shove them into a backstage promo for a fight like YEYY!! Something to add some flavor to Smackdown. I will punt you instead of that Orton child.

Urgh these idiotboxes make me sooo angry! So let me GET OFF of smashing them, because I will be very angry soon!!

So Beth and Melina had a good match up at Royal Rumble. It was wubby. :) I'm happy to be wrong that Melina actually won the title. I didn't expect that! WWE gets half a point. I still win though as I'm ROYAL!

Now onto RAW OR as I always Beth/Melina Central! Beth && Jillian picked up a win on Kelly Kelly && Melina. Oh my god, Jillian has won a match! Rosa Mendes was irkful. Why is she trying so hard to be a stalking psycho fan? -.- STOP IT! Be normal and natural. Goodness! However, that idiot features made a save by being a complete spaz case in the backstage area with Santino and Bethy. But, really, I will make a stand and smack all the divas once I get there. Believe me I will!

HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN!The BITCH IS BACK! Stephanie McMahon has been slapping people right and left. Well, just Randy Orton. Did I mention HOW MUCH I wub Stephie? She's a Royal in training. ;)By the way, IED is retarded disease to say Orton has...why would he want to be mental? He better just be a complete psycho... and tell people he hears voices and they want him to smack people around. NOW THAT WILL BE WUBBY. Thank goodness Stephie is a creepy evil lady bitch!

Now did I ever mention how Katie Lea is the Queen of ECW? Well she is! Read her Blogs! Her blogs are almost as great as the Confessions! Not quite to my level of genius yet! ;) Hehe.

Talking about exchanges, WWE Universe held a Live Blog on Royal Rumble with Melina, Katie Lea, and Natalya. Definitely something Diva fans should read! Katie Lea and Nattie exchange blows to each other. And Melina talks about John Morrison in every other sentence. They sooo got back together. Haha, good for them. The Royals were devastated when they broke up because of that CUNT, Boretista! Are we the only ones who are pleased that he's on a sabbatical due to an injury. Hey, it's not like we wished injuries on people even on that thing. But he needs a break off of MY TV before I physically chisel that ugly out of him. HOLLERINGGG!!

So there's this news alert on TNA Mobile. A NEW INVESTOR! And it's a lady! Who the hell is it? Watch it be "Sarah Palin" Daffney since she took some money off of the Beautiful People a while ago! They did give money to "Sarah Palin". Or it could be some other lady. Oh well, hopefully, it's the "Governor"!

Did you people see Candice vs Melina in the houseshow? Candilicious looked a BIT CHUBBY?! Oh dear!

Question of the day, why does Kelly Kelly get more cheers than the Women's Champion, Melina? Is it because Kelly Kelly likes to flash?

But whatever, I recently received Voices WWE Volume 9 CD. It's quite lovely. Maryse's song, Pourquoi, is quite wubby, BUT dirty. HOLLA, which is Kelly Kelly's song, is another keeper. I love how Kelly Kelly's theme song keeps getting remixed and appears on the CDs. Haha.I actually quite wub Priceless, Voices, and Get on your Knees. Eve's theme ( She Looks Good) is very scary. The other night I was blaring The Great Khali's ( The Land of Five Rivers) and Kozlov's ( Pain) because they are royally funny. Awesome CD. Go find these wonderful songs and blare them to irk others! ;)

Well, I don't know what else to say. So this will conclude this addition to the Confessions of a Royal Biatch! Remember you can look but NEVER EVER touch the ROYALS! We are simply the best! And if you don't agree with us, then you suck!

HOLLLERINGGGGG

Sincerely yours,
Mercedes Phoenix Valentine, The One and Only Italian Biatch
(aka Marcella)
I'm worth more than you ever know!Cos all you know is what is you see! Cos you all are blind to who WE are. Cos what you see is a mystery. Cos WE ARE

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Marci at 22:05 |

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